I’m not really a relationship talking type but if something has got my mind so busy like this then I’ve got to pen it down and share it. This ain’t a movie review tho’ the movie was great, great story line even if the outplay of some scenes ain’t satisfactory to me but I’m not writing this to review the movie. NO! I’m writing to discuss the one thing that got me thinking even after watching the movie.
Well, You might have seen this movie HistoryBox which I saw too recently and it reminds me that there is so much going on in the relationships nowadays not to talk of what might have gone or might be going on outside relationships.
The movie was about 3 friends; Adams, Zack & Steve who all had a fiancée respectively as a matter of fact. One day, Adams heard a radio programme where it was discussed if it Is healthy for partners in a relationship to know about the past of their partners which they all took to practise and the rest of the movie was HISTORY. . .
Now I’m gonna make this post a dialogue where I’ll like my readers to really express their views on the questions by dropping comments.
* Is it healthy for partners in a relationship to know about the past of their partners??!
* Can you take a baggage clean for your partner with ain’t hurt sense??!
* What part of his/her past can make you have second thoughts on the marriage??!
Well, we all know the saying that the past is in the past blah blah blah but the truth is that the past is a reflection directly or indirectly to who the person is now so i feel knowing the past will allow me understand the person better. What he has been through; How he sees things; The good; The nasty; The crazy; The bad and how they might affect the future either positively or negatively . . . But trust me if you know you might not be able to handle what you’ll find out, why ask in the first place? Like I usually say, What you don’t know can’t kill you (just trying to see the situation from another perspective tho’).
I asked a couple of friends what they think and these are their replies.
Question: What part of his/her past can make you have second thoughts on the marriage??!
* Blessing (F) – There is no part of his past that I can’t overlook and go on with the marriage.
* Victor (M) – If she was raped It might affect the relationship but I can still cope with that but if she’s done abortions I can’t cope with that.
* Mujidat (F) – If he still sees his EX even after we’re ready for marriage then I can’t go ahead with the plan cos even after marriage he’ll still cheat on me with her.
* Onas (M) – If she has done abortions before or has slept with any of my family members or close friends then I can have second thoughts on the marriage.
* Segun (M) – There is no part of her past that can make me not go ahead with the marriage since its already in her past.
* Taiwo (F) – If I found out he was already engaged to another lady and he never told me that before I definitely can’t go ahead with the marriage.
* Deji (M) – If she has been lying to be a virgin then I found out on the wedding night that the relationship was built on lies, I’m so not continuing with the marriage.
* Deola (F) – Even if he has killed in his past, since he’s changed and the past is gone, we’ll move on too. I’ll forgive him.
* Jacob (M) – There is nothing about her past that I can’t forgive her for.
Well, I’m not surprise most females will find it extremely hard not to forgive the man and let it go because WHEN A WOMAN LOVES (referring to R Kelly’ song) but the truth is no matter how bad a guy’s past is once he’s loved its easy for the woman to let go only with few exceptions. But, talking about men, its like they’ve got so many things they can’t live with after finding out about her past events especially if she’s had history with their friends (but they have history with our female friends and we forgive them). Well, I’m a woman so I don’t understand what they feel or what goes on in their head but I know it gets hard for them to look beyond the past when they eventually know. *ain’t judging*
Please drop your comments, I’ll honestly like to know what you think too. I love to LEARN!
I’m not sorry my blog posts are always long, just sorry I can’t help it. . . lots of love!